Yesterday afternoon, when I serendipitously had childcare arranged for the evening, my friend, Richard, asked me out to dinner out of the blue. "How delightful!" I thought. "Yes!" I said. When he asked me where I wanted to go, I said, "Surprise me!" I was in the perfect mood to step outside of my box - both literally and figuratively. I didn't want to make decisions; I just wanted to have fun. The only thing I wanted to think about was what to wear. Instead of throwing on a pair of jeans and a comfy top, I decided to dress up. I looked at several Summer dresses I bought this year for my vacation, and I finally chose the tomato red number I had so much fun in one fabulous day and night in New Orleans. It didn't take much else to look ready to go - a simple fresh water pearl and silver necklace and earrings are all I added to dress it up. Red kind of makes a statement all it's own!
Now, I've thought about wearing this dress ever since being back in Oregon with it this Summer, but it just never seemed right. The weather has been too cold some evenings, or I had nowhere to go in it on other evenings. Plus, it's kind of a femme fatale dress, because of the way it accentuates curves and demands attention with it's vibrant color. I just haven't felt comfortable standing out like that since I've been back from New Orleans. My inhibitions get in the way here in Portland, it seems. Back in New Orleans, I felt so free and feminine - just comfortable with myself and my curves. Maybe it was because I was vacation, and I refused to let any negative body image spoil my good time. Or, maybe it was New Orleans, herself. There was certainly a heady magic in the air there! It could have also been because men smiled at me and complimented me there everywhere we went. I hadn't been flirted with like that in years! Whatever it was, it made me feel so much more relaxed, and sexy. And much less inhibited about slipping into this knockout dress.
Last night I decided it was time to kick my inhibitions to the curb. Even after I had it on and had fixed my makeup and hair, though, I was still not sure it was the right thing to wear. But then, Stella and Annie saw me. "Mom! You look so beautiful!" Stella exclaimed. Annie grinned broadly, and said, "I like that dress!" Their dad, who was over to watch them and Evan, just sort of just swallowed and mumbled something affirmative. I knew he liked the way I looked. That was all I needed. I added a touch of the perfume I bought in New Orleans, and out the door I went, feeling very womanly and pretty.
Richard had suggested La Buca, a Northwest/Italian type place for dinner, so I headed over to the East side and found some parking down the street, a couple of blocks from the restaurant. I got that little nervous feeling about the dress again just before I stepped out of the car, but it backed down quickly and confidence took over when, as I walked down the street, I realized that people were not only noticing me, but smiling broadly at me. Two women complimented me, and men stopped their conversations to glance over at me. Wow - did that make me walk tall! I truly felt like a million bucks when I crossed the street to meet my friend. It was easy to smile and he had a big smile in return and lovely compliments, too. We had a great meal, lovely conversation, and I felt really wonderful all evening. It was a perfect way to spend a Friday evening in Portland.
I will remember how confident and pretty I felt and I will do that again. Sometimes you just have to get your girly-girl on!
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